Daily Routines for Your ADHD Family

Daily Routines for your ADHD FamilyLast week I talked about how to create a back to school routine for your family.

Now this just doesn’t apply to your kids. This applies to you as well.

My husband has told me time and time again that I do my best work, have the best attitude, and become overwhelmed a lot less often when I make a routine for myself and stick to it.

I’m very good at creating routines and schedules. Oh I could spend all day crafting charts, finding cute images to correlate with each task, and displaying them so neatly on my refrigerator. My problem comes with the follow-through. My personality despises doing anything wrong or pretty much “not perfect” in my eyes. I freeze when I can’t or don’t know how to start something just the right way.  Read More

4 Steps to Creating a Back to School Routine

It’s that time of year again. School supplies, new clothes, new backpacks, sports tryouts, after-school clubs, and everything else that comes with the beginning of a new school year. It’s also an opportunity to begin a brand new routine that will help your family have a well-prepared and chaotic free (as much as possible) school year.

Routines and schedules are just one tool that can help make this happen. The following steps are what we use in our home to help make the days as stress-free as we can.

Back to School Routine

Step #1 – Divide the day into 2 categories: Morning & Evening

Step #2 – Make a list of everything that needs to get done during a school day, from the moment the children wake up, until they go to bed. Place each task under one category. Some tasks may have more than 1 category, for example ‘brush teeth’ may fall under both morning and evening.

Our list looks like this:  Read More

How to Talk With Your Spouse Who is Struggling With Depression

Struggling with depressionMy husband has written a few articles on what it’s like to live with someone with depression. I truly appreciate his honesty and his openness to be vulnerable enough to talk about this with you.

As a minister, it’s often hard to admit when you’re struggling with something, whether it’s finances, family issues, or something that’s simply beyond your control.

In the articles he wrote he shared 8 changes he needed to make as a husband married to a woman with depression. The following quotes are from his article “A Spouse’s Response to Depression – Part 2”:

I had to learn to set aside time for Samantha.

This meant I needed to make her a priority in my life. She needs my time. This is how she is geared. I am not geared the same way. She needed to know that I would take the time to drop things to focus on her. This is a very hard step. Sometimes I came up with every possible reason why I couldn’t do it, but it is essential.

I had to learn to pray for my wife.

I actually had to learn how to pray from compassion and love for what Samantha was going through, instead of praying my selfish prayers. I am really good at praying selfishly. I had to learn to change that and pray for victory for her, not just for my own peace and harmony.

I had to learn to listen. Read More

How to Talk With Your Spouse About Your Depression

Weekly Theme

This is a question that has been asked often of me, as I’ve shared how Chad and I worked through my depression together.  There really is not a simple quick answer for this. It really depends on the history of your relationship, the unique dynamics of your marriage, and your current situation. What I can do is give you some guidelines and ideas of what we’ve done to grow closer and strengthen our marriage through this trial.

Let me first explain why this takes a bit of strategic planning.

For years I treated Chad horribly. I didn’t understand what I was going through and blamed my anger, depression, and wretched behavior on Chad, believing he wasn’t meeting my needs, and on my role as a Mom, realizing this dream of cute, snuggly babies and an organized, clean house was definitely not reality. I know many parents have these thoughts, especially when it seems like all you do is cook, change diapers, and do laundry. Enough of that and anyone will go crazy.

I was a wreck, and I was blaming Chad and making it his responsibility to fix me. After being married for almost 20 years, I realize now that is not how marriage works. Read More